boistering

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Astral Pancake

There is a scene in the film 8 1/2 where Guido the protagonist goes to the train station to meet his mistress. While there he reads some notes a reviewer wrote of his latest film idea whereupon the reviewer states (we hear as voiceover) that the symbols representing the various amores of Guido's (i.e., Fellini) new film are trite, cliche, all of it bad, the worst of any he's used. He (Guido) throws down the paper crosses his arms and legs, reconsiders for just a fraction of a moment and then proceeds to walk over to where the crumpled paper is and picks it up again in order to save it and probably reread it. This moment between the negation and the realization that one must live with criticism and infuse it into the new meaning or anti-meaning is where I spend my afternoons. A state of denial, a continual beginning and reordering.



Glimmer at

table once thought

Wordsworth proclaimed emotions

are mere ants against

pyramidal organs

each breath a sharp leaf

razing consciousness


these are stones, twigs fallen

to the forest floor of human


stomach


did you see me level cities?


as if that were possible

(we're only birds in a children's story)


else dwarves grinning

cosmos of cereal bowl

thought

1 Comments:

  • At 10:23 AM, Blogger Maya Deren said…

    I sit at my table and wage war on myself
    It seems like it’s all...it’s all for nothing
    I know the barricades, and
    I know the mortar in the wall breaks
    I recognize the weapons, I used them well

    This is my mistake. Let me make it good
    I raised the wall, and I will be the one to knock it down

    I’ve a rich understanding of my finest defenses
    I proclaim that claims are left unstated,
    I demand a rematch
    I decree a stalemate
    I divine my deeper motives
    I recognize the weapons
    I’ve practiced them well. I fitted them myself

    It’s amazing what devices you can sympathize...empathize
    This is my mistake. Let me make it good
    I raised the walls, and I will be the one to knock it down

    Reach out for me and hold me tight. Hold that memory
    Let my machine talk to me. Let my machine talk to me

    This is my world
    And I am the world leader pretend
    This is my life
    And this is my time
    I have been given the freedom
    To do as I see fit
    It’s high time I’ve razed the walls
    That I’ve constructed

    It’s amazing what devices you can sympathize...emapathize
    This is my mistake. Let me make it good
    I raised the walls, and I will be the one to knock it down

    You fill in the mortar. You fill in the harmony
    You fill in the mortar. I raised the walls
    And I’m the only one
    I will be the one to knock it down

     

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